So anyone who reads Ok! Magazine, or looks at it in the check out line at Acme, knows that the Kardashians have released their Christmas card to the public. Aren't we middle-class folk just blessed to see what flawless photograph they've decided to distribute this year? At first I thought I'd been looking at the Addams family Christmas card, but then I realized that what I was looking at was the lovely Jenner-Kardashian-whateverthehellthey'recalled family!
On your far left, as Ok! magazine so clearly pointed out, is Kylie Jenner, the youngest other than that little kid Mason they won't shut up about. She looks to be about twenty years old, the size of Kim, but is infact thirteen! It looks like they had her on stilts under that overpriced dress!
At the very bottom of the page I noticed what these people were wearing was also listed. Scott's wearing: Scott's own, Lamar's wearing: Lamar's own... ok, new way to say I got this from my closet! Abbey's wearing: Abbey's own... has a nice ring to it?
Fifteen year old, seven foot Kendall Jenner is wearing a very chic, couture couture grass shrug that only the snake skin dress wearing mannequin can pull off. Kourtney wears a tuxedo, Bruce and Kris look like a happy lesbian couple, and they all look like statues!
Turn to the next page and there's a spread about little Mason's extravagant 1st birthday party, or as ok! likes to call it: the party to end all parties... pretty bold statement to make about a party celebrating the twelfth month of some kid's life. I personally think it's stupid to throw such a big party for a kid who has no clue as to what the fuck is going on. I think Kris was more excited about the goats at the petting zoo than Mason will ever be.
So basically, if you want to scare your friends send them this sexayyy Christmas card.
Nice going you tallentless plastic beauties! Happy holidays to everyone!
xoxo, Abbey
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